


Kings and Queens

by Murder_Kitten



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bets & Wagers, Dare, Drag Queens, M/M, Pillow Fights, Quidditch
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:21:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23369131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Murder_Kitten/pseuds/Murder_Kitten
Summary: Created for the Cards Against Muggles Crack Fest, featuring the card combination: Kingsley Shacklebolt looking classy as fuck is the reason boys aren't allowed in the girls dormitories.When Kingsley agreed to a bet with James Potter, he couldn't have imagined what he would have to lose...or gain in a wild night of classy pillowfights.OneShot. Complete.
Relationships: Peter Pettigrew/Kingsley Shacklebolt
Comments: 24
Kudos: 13
Collections: Cards Against Muggles Crack Fest





	Kings and Queens

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: the characters do not belong to me but are the property of J.K.R and Warner Bros. No copyright infringement is intended. I make no profit from these works. All stories are for fun and entertainment only. 
> 
> I always welcome reviews/comments of people who enjoy my works. 
> 
> Thank you for taking the time to read. I hope you enjoy it.

Kingsley Shacklebolt adjusted his shiny Head Boy badge with a smirk. The quidditch semi-finals were about to begin and Kingsley was quite confident as to the outcome of the match. So confident in fact, that he’d made a bet with James Potter. James was an idiot, Kingsley thought smugly. Clearly, he’d been dropped on his head several times as a child; it was a wonder that thick head of hair hadn’t protected him from the impact. Nobody in their right mind would have bet on Hufflepuff to beat Slytherin, yet James had, putting up fifty galleons on Hufflepuff to win. Kingsley was already thinking about what he’d spend his winnings on. He’d probably blow it all on a Hogsmeade date with Peter Pettigrew – that sweet boy was all kinds of fine. Kingsley remembered the last stolen kiss they’d shared in that hidden alcove on the fifth floor. He loved the way Peter kissed. He had this marvellous way of nibbling on Kingsley’s lower lip, like some kind of deranged rat, but _Merlin,_ it drove Kingsley absolutely wild.

“Feeling confident, Kings?” a cocky voice called from behind him and Kingsley twisted around in his seat. James Potter had arrived with his usual entourage – Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and (Kingsley’s heart skipped a beat) _Peter Pettigrew._ Hoping he wasn’t drooling, Kingsley acknowledged them with a nod and a warm smile for Peter, who promptly blushed, tripping over Sirius’s dragonhide boots (not exactly in line with the school dress code but Sirius was such a rock star that nobody would question it) and falling into Remus Lupin’s lap face first. Kingsley glared jealously; Peter should be tripping into his arms. He just hated keeping their relationship a secret, but Peter was such a shy mouse of a boy, Kingsley hated to rat him out to his friends.

“Too late to change your mind, Potter.” Kingsley said smugly. The match had already started and Slytherin had just scored an early goal, the Hufflepuff keeper shrieking and diving out of the way of the goal hoops with her arms over her head. _Pathetic,_ Kingsley thought with a half laugh at the Keeper’s efforts. Those galleons would be his in no time at all.

“Care to make things more interesting?” James offered as Slytherin scored their fifth goal of the match, Hufflepuff having failed to score at all.

“Sure.” Kingsley said, knowing the money was as good as his. “What did you have in mind?”

James flashed him a wicked grin. “Winner takes the gold, that goes without saying. But the _loser,_ has to do any dare the winner gives him.” He said challengingly. Kingsley rolled his eyes. He’d dare Potter to do his own homework for a change, that would surprise everyone and give Remus Lupin a night off.

“Deal.” He said, shaking Potter’s hand as Slytherin scored yet another goal.

“It’s on then.” James said smugly, not looking worried at all. Kingsley had just started to wonder at that. The match was extremely one sided, and Potter was losing the bet. How could he be so infuriatingly confident?

But what Kingsley didn’t know, and should have expected from the devious James Potter, was a little match fixing. Nothing obvious of course, that would draw the teacher’s attention and James spent enough time in detention as it was. Not that he minded, it gave Sirius some extra special alone time with Professor Mcgonagall. She was one cool cat and delighted in making Black beg for her praise like a dog. Honestly, it was a wonder Black didn’t roll over and beg her to scratch his belly.

Kingsley was so focused on the match that he failed to notice James Potter’s whispered spell “ _Adtraho!”_ that he directed at the Hufflepuff seeker who was hovering opposite them, looking bored, just waiting for Slytherin to put the team out of their misery. As though an invisble magnetic force was suddenly operating on the seeker, his arm shot out in time to catch a tiny golden ball that affixed to his palm and stuck there like glue.

“I’ve got the Snitch!” The Hufflepuff seeker exclaimed in shock and the game ended abruptly, none more surprised than Kingsley Shacklebolt as to the outcome. But a bet was a bet, and there was no refuting the results. Hufflepuff had won – one hundred and fifty points to Slytherin’s ninety points. It was time to pay up.

“Your winnings.” Kingsley said stiffly, counting out fifty galleons from his change purse that he kept in the inner pocket of his robes.

James Potter grinned. ”Thanks. Meet me in our dormitory at ten for your dare. No wussing out Shacklebolt.” He said with a sly smile as Kingsley glared.

* * *

Dutifully, at 10pm that night, Kingsley Shacklebolt knocked on James Potter’s dormitory door.

“Kings!” James exclaimed happily. “You made it! Come in!”

Against his better judgement, Kingsley entered the room and shut the door. The Marauder’s looked to have been having a little drinking party, empty bottles of firewhiskey littering the floor, and Kingsley knew immediately what James had spent his winnings on.

“Now for your dare.” James grinned. “Come here, I’ll whisper it to you.”

Kingsley winced at the feeling of James Potter’s warm breath in his ear, but then his eyes widened at the issued challenge.

“No! No way in hell!” He said furiously.

“A bet’s a bet, Kings. You promised.” Remus Lupin reminded him.

“How am I even supposed to get up there? The Hogwarts Founder’s enchanted it so that boys can’t get in.” Kingsley argued.

“Figure it out.” Sirius said sleepily. “We all have.”

“Fine. _Fine.”_ Kingsley said furiously. He just knew he was going to regret this.

* * *

A half hour and some human transfiguration spells saw Kingsley Shacklebolt sneaking up the stairs to the girl’s dormitories looking classy as _fuck,_ if he did say so himself. His curly black hair had lengthened to midway down his back, his breasts enlarged with the help of an _engorgio_ charm and he was attired in a tight fitting skirt, halter top and high heeled pumps. He hoped this worked, as he made it to the top of the stairs and turned the handle of the girl’s dormitory.

“How long til we call Mcgonagall to come up here and bust him?” Sirius asked.

“Ten minutes? Fifteen?” James shrugged. “Let’s give him a fair chance.”

“What did you tell him to do anyway?” Remus asked curiously, looking up from his book.

James smirked. “I dared him to pantie raid Lily Evans.”

“You did NOT.” Remus said, awed.

“I did.” James said solemnly, dissolving into a fit of giggles. “Honestly, I hope he succeeds. I’d love a pair of Evans’ panties.”

* * *

“ _Hellooooooo…”_ Kingsley called, putting on a girlie voice as he opened the door to the dormitory.

“What the hell are you doing in here?” Lily Evans demanded, sitting up from her bed, where she’d been lying flat, writing in her diary.

Kingsley cleared his throat nervously. “I’m your new roommate.” He said in an unconvincing high pitched voice.

Lily Evans glared suspiciously at him. “What’s your name then?”

“And where are your robes?” Mary McDonald added, eying Kingsley’s exposed cleavage.

“Ki—rrra…Kirr..aaa….Lee!...Kirralee.” Kingsley stammered, shrugging as he tried to appear nonchalant. “My robes are in the wash.” He lied quickly, covering the sticky moment with an awkward girlie giggle.

“What are you girls up to anyway?” He said, twirling his long hair around his finger, before flipping it over his shoulder.

“Studying.” Lily shrugged.

“Want to play a game?” Kingsley offered.

“Sure!” Mary McDonald agreed, sick to death of staring at her Arithmancy equations.

* * *

Forty five minutes later, the door to the girl’s dormitory swung open as Professors Mcgonagall and Dumbledore entered, having received an anonymous tip-off that there was screaming coming from the girl’s dormitories. Both Professors froze on the threshold, gobsmacked. There was no screaming. Instead, there were half a dozen girls jumping on their beds, clad only in pyjama tops and panties, engaged in a multi-person pillow fight, feathers drifting through the air as the girls shrieked and giggled by turn.

And in the thick of it all, having his bottom swatted by a pillow and an enthusiastic Lily Evans-

“SHACKLEBOLT!” Mcgonagall exclaimed in shock, bringing the pillow fight to a halt immediately.

“Join us Professor!” Shacklebolt said with a girly giggle, as Professor Dumbledore looked half tempted, picking up a pillow from the floor and waving it around.

“Absolutely not! Out! Out!” Minerva shrieked as Kingsley fled the scene, leaving one high heeled pump behind.

Lily and Mary soon set the dormitory back in order as a furious Mcgonagall glared at them all, muttering something about enforcing a new rule banning boys and Shacklebolt especially from the girl’s dormitories.

“I know you don’t like him Minerva.” Dumbledore said, admiring the glittering high heeled shoe Shacklebolt had left behind. ‘But you can’t deny…Shacklebolt’s got _style!”_

Safely back in his dormitory, Kingsley Shacklebolt adjusted his Head Boy badge with a smirk. He'd pulled it off. He was classy as fuck, and the Marauders knew it. Shacklebolt for the win. 


End file.
